Give Me Time Machinery

the making and searing

the first memory deer crosses glowworms paranoia

a thick cloud before the swim a hot tennis game

a lean back and think about love

and how do we reconcile suicide slut shames

drumming a cage of our own meaning?

It’s for our own good the second memory

thick BullFrog sunblock druggy dithyrambs

pulling stained scarves from the sweet-smelling drawer

pubic hair peeking from under our velvet bikinis.

I finished the book of Joan Crawford

three small sleeping pills

I wanted some safety in days.

You said eat all the ice cream in plastic ball caps

that the walking would slim me

and maybe the father could be our matrix

hot thump geography

cheap instant coffee.

He’ll storm. It will pass

and the white van full of girlparts

will roll by so slowly where getting married in the morning

will seem like a black dream

where I will worry my writing four strawberry shortcakes

shut the door widow-lipped and chemically backlit

where your heart will kind of destroy me.

#poetry #JessieJaneshek